Secrets of Powerful Disaster
by R.J.Prastos
Summary: An old friend from long ago returns to Levi, threatening to drown him in a torrent of indecision and tragedy. Whatever he does, he must live with the choices he's made, just as he once told Eren. Yaoi. Eren/Levi changes to Levi/Male OC and Eren/Mikasa. Spoilers.
1. Prologue

**Thank you for reading! :)**

**Disclaimer: Do I really need one? I'm on FanFiction not FictionPress for crying out loud!**

**Spoilers in this chapter: Attack on Titan: No Regrets.**

**Spoilers over all: Everything. Correct me if I make any mistakes.**

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Dim lights cast shadows on the dirty and dusty walls of the stone tunnel. A small figure hides, crouched down in the darkness. They shift around, staying always in the shadows, and lean against the cool, damp stone, their legs hanging off the side of the ledge bathed in shadows. Letting out a soft sigh they wrap their arms around their thin frame before falling silent and still once more.

Not far up ahead is a staircase to which the first is turned towards. A second figure of young complexion, light brown hair, and deep, chocolate-colored eyes slowly makes their way down the grey stone stairs. With every step they test different ideas on how to silence, or at least muffle, their footsteps. Feeling like he has made progress in his findings, he gives himself a small nod of satisfaction at the bottom of the steps. He then crosses to the other side of the tunnel before hugging the wall and its shadows as his path draws him closer to the ledge.

The first figure silently shifts, preparing for ambush, as his victim creeps nearer. He silently launches himself off the ledge and grabs the second's shoulders, pushing him over onto his back in a pin. The second blinks rapidly, startled by the speed of the assault, before smiling up at the first.

"Levi," he softly chides, "we're in the light." He knew that Levi hated stepping out of the shadows for fear of being found and always got mad at the second if they stood in the light for too long.

Though Levi is obviously older, they both still look young in age. The second one studies Levi's raven, straight back hair, parted in the middle and styled in an undercut, his cold, intimidating grey eyes, and facial features as if to memorize them. Levi observes the second without betraying a hint of emotion.

"You're late," he deadpans quietly before standing up, pulling the young male up with him, "what's your excuse this time, Sven?"

Sven lets out a quiet, sad sigh, suddenly feeling tired and as if the weight of the world are on his shoulders. Levi, who had turned around, looks at his friend, concern only showing faintly in his eyes, "Sven?"

His friend brushes past him lightly and slowly makes his way up to the ledge. Levi, silent and fast, is sitting on the ledge before Sven has even made it up halfway. By the time Sven gets up onto the high ledge, Levi is rummaging through the bag he kidnapped from Sven earlier. His friend takes the bag away from him and pulls a sandwich from within a hidden pocket Levi hadn't noticed earlier. He hands the sandwich to his friend before placing the bag between them and leaning against the wall heavily.

With manners learned from Sven, Levi eats the food slowly despite his starvation. He hadn't eaten for so long. Sven studies him, Levi's thinks, because he always does, and doesn't mind if he is for he studied Sven earlier, as he approached. Levi feels a little bad about pressing Sven's crisp, white shirt into the dirty floor, but Sven should have learned by now to wear something different. Levi got away with his white, long sleeved, button up shirt with a collar simply because he is a neat freak. Levi had noticed earlier that Sven isn't wearing his normal black suit jacket and black slacks, just the short sleeved, white shirt, tan pants, and black cravat. Both of them are wearing knee-high boots, but that's the only common thing. Levi doesn't have multiple clothes like Sven; he doesn't have the money that Sven does either. No, he lives in the Underground District, the poor district, while Sven lives above, within Wall Sina's rich society. All he has to wear is his shirt, boots, and black pants, but Levi doesn't mind too much.

Remembering that the sandwich might be all that he could get to eat for awhile weighs down on Levi and looks over at Sven, having finished, and notices with curiosity that Sven is looking out ahead, into the blackness of the other wall. He does not start the conversation, he never does, but he really wants to ask Sven what's wrong, he can tell that there is something troubling him. Levi distracts himself by putting his hand in the pocket and pulling out three sandwiches with surprise. He looks up at his melancholy campaign; Sven _always_ ate with Levi, it was his way of reminding himself of what Levi goes through every day. Not eating in between lunch and midnight always reminded Sven of Levi's daily battle for food. So why is he not eating? _Sven is normally so full of energy and life, always excited and chatting away, so why is he so down? Why is he like this?_ Levi's mind buzzes as he softly calls out his friend's name.

"I'm not hungry," Sven murmurs tiredly, the fatigue lacing his voice, "you can have it." Levi started to get the feeling that his friend's tiredness isn't the normal "its midnight, Levi, what the hell do you expect of me," tiredness that Sven gets when he visits sometimes. He moves the bag to Sven's other side and moves to sit close to him, their arms barely brushing against each other. Some people thought that Levi didn't care, but he had taught Sven better. Levi has his own silently way of showing his concern, such as sitting so closely to his friend.

"Why are you so quiet tonight?" Levi inquires softly, finally giving up on Sven starting the conversation. The eerie silence had gotten to him, only Sven is able to make the silence seem suffocating to Levi, he never had a problem with it at any other time.

Sven turns exhausted, depressed, brown eyes to Levi's cold grey ones, "I'm moving," he whispers.

A startled look flashes across Levi's face for the briefest of seconds. "Why," he asks with slight confusion. He realizes that Sven must be tired from packing and getting everything in order. He actually had stuff to take with him when he moved.

"I don't want to join the military," he gives a small shrug, looking away, "so I got a job as an apprentice to become a blade maker. My parents told me to find something to do with my life so I settled for moving to a factory city over joining the military."

Levi frowns at him, his brow furrowing more, and says, "why not get a closer job? Why move when you become a merchant or something?"

He snorts at the word merchant, "and become a fat pig that he lost himself to his money? No thank you," contempt drips from his words, "I would never do something like that." He looks at Levi, his eyes clearing of their contempt, "I know how you feel about them, Levi, and how you feel about my family. But there is so much you have yet to learn," the fact that Levi is six years his senior does not stop Sven's soft chide, "there are things you have yet to learn, like how there isn't any closer jobs." He looks back across the way, a small smile tugging at his lips, "besides, I enjoy the idea of making blades for the Survey Corps; it makes me feel like I will be preventing Tobi's death." Levi suppresses a sigh at the mention of Tobi, Sven's older brother, he hated him for the way he ignored Sven. Just because Sven was adopted didn't make him anything less than Tobi, that's the way Levi sees it. "Don't worry Levi," Levi's eyes snap up to met Sven's soft brown eyes, "you have Farlan and Isabel." He seems to have a second thought because he then adds, "and that other guy," to the list. Levi once more suppresses a sigh; Sven had no idea of what Levi went through or did. Levi once more contemplates what Sven might do if he finds out while Sven realizes, not for the first time, how little he knows about Levi. He gets up, deciding that it is stupid to consider how different things would be if Sven had never been adopted or if someone else had taken in Levi, like the Worthington family that lived next to Sven.

Sven slowly starts his descent down the crumbling rock "staircase" in the wall of the tunnel. Levi grabs Sven's bag and launches off the ledge, landing with only a small thud on the ground far below. Life in the tunnels had taught him stealth and quietness amongst other things. Sven heard the noise and is now looking at Levi down below. Levi considers his young friend for a moment, way up on the wall. Sven decides to try and copy Levi so he jumps off, heading straight for Levi. Surprise registers within Levi and on his face as he sees his friend take a literal leap of faith. He trusted Levi enough to do something that terrified him, which touched Levi's self-described, cold heart.

Sven's heavy landing sends the tunnels into a frenzy of echoing the sound, making Levi cringe internally; such a noise could be the last noise anyone ever made in Levi's world. Sven starts to fall, not being use to landing, and Levi catches him before he barely even starts to crumble to the ground. "Careful," he murmurs softly, his mouth close to his friend's ear now.

"Thanks," Sven lets out quietly, feeling incredibly embarrassed, why did he take that stupid leap? Sometimes he felt like such an insider in Levi's world; he had seen in his eyes, he knew that that noise could have meant his death in Levi's cold world. Levi knew how to be swift and quiet, something Sven envied strongly. Levi could even pin Sven to the ground, having jumped off the high ledge, and not make a noise, not even Sven's back against the pavement made a noise when Levi did it. Sometimes Sven wonders if Levi's really an assassin, sometimes he wishes he could be more like Levi, silent and stealthy, but this is not one of those times. Right now he just wishes that he didn't have to leave his friend behind, that he could spend the rest of his life with him. He wishes, not for the first time, that he could get Levi out of this life and into the light of day, the life of the city above.

The unexpected weight of his bag on his shoulder startles him and causes him to look up at Levi, catching his eyes with his as Levi drapes the strap over Sven's shoulder. Emotions suddenly choke him as he realizes that this is the last time he would ever see or speak to Levi again. He surprises Levi, not for the first time, by throwing his arms around him and pulling him into a fierce embrace. He's never hugged Levi before and he has never felt the muscles Levi's small frame hide either. After a few hesitant moments of surprise, Levi hugs his childhood friend back. They had known each other for too long to be separated so easily. Levi holds Sven close, nearly crushing him, as he realizes that even when Sven visits his parents, he will never again be able to visit Levi. It's time for them to move one, time for this good thing to come to an end. Levi doesn't realize that it is his unflappable, calm demeanor that has been Sven's source of strength for the past few years. He doesn't know that Sven only gathers the courage and strength to move on because he knows that Levi accepted the move before he even questioned it. Sven almost cried, but knowing Levi would still be able to get on without him helped to ground him. He lets go sooner than either would have liked, and lets Levi take the lead.

Levi surprises him when he takes them into the light's path. leading them down the tunnel while being bathed in light. They get to the bottom of the stairs and Levi looks at Sven with his normal, calm look, "take care," he murmurs softly, hoping Sven won't get himself into trouble.

"Stay safe and unharmed, Levi," Sven murmurs, "I don't want to find out you died in these tunnels." Sven didn't need to put his greatest wish to words, Levi understood well enough what Sven meant; get out of these tunnels, make a life for yourself, be happy, not weary. Sven wants Levi to have a better life, they both knew it just as well as they both knew how difficult it would be for Levi to escape the Ackerman that he is a disciple to; to escape this world.

Sven reaches in to his bag once more, nearly forgetting, and pulls out a small parcel that he hands to Levi. He nods curtly and then walks up the stairs, never once looking back. _He doesn't need me, he has Farlan and Isabel._ Sven disappears into the darkness of night while Levi opens his gift, walking away from his ledge and further into the tunnel and back towards the Underground District.

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**May 09, 2014 (Day First Published On): Trying to finish the next one. Will post it soon. Hopefully.**


	2. Sven

**Updated the same day as first published? Rare for me. :)**

**I have gotten one review and that makes me excited, so, here you go!**

**Note: I'm assuming Levi to be 35 in the year 851 and have made Sven 29.**

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**Chapter 02: Sven**

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18 years later . . .

Year 851 . . .

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Secretive grey eyes haunt Sven's dreams, always forgotten upon consciousness, soothe Sven's mind and put him to ease long after being forgotten with the rising sun. A voice from a distant memory gives Sven strength when he felt weak, helping him through ever rough patch in his life. It is a voice that sounds strange, yet familiar, to Sven as it daily went about encouraging him, strengthening him, exciting him, and inspiring him to do better.

Ever since Sven was 12 years old, 18 years ago, he had made it his mission to be quiet and stealthy when he moved. He could no longer remember what it was that had inspired him to do so, only that it had been a very difficult period of time for him. His light-hearted and playful personality always kept him out of trouble with the other factory workers that he snuck up on unsuspectingly, scaring them on a daily basis. It was because of his skills that they had suggested _it_, the idea that haunts him now. They were the ones who had convinced him to do _it_, why did he agree?

He sighs and opens his eyes, having forgotten the eyes that made this easier on him. He smiles softly at the ceiling, feeling much better. It feels good for him to be back in his own bed, back at home now. He had been home for a few days now and every day he was grateful for it. He stands up and puts on his military uniform, the one he had been wearing for the past three years of training. He is allowed back at home due to his skills with blade making for being the only one in all of the human territory with such a low blade failure rate, the sharpest blades, the fastest at making them, and the strongest blades, all made his skills highly valued and him a huge asset which, coupled with a delay in graduation, had allowed for this special circumstance. While the others stressed over their decisions, Sven continued working on the blades that he had been designing for the past 12 years. They were inspired by someone Sven had long since forgotten. The only thing he remembered was the key points that inspired the different aspects of the blades, like their cleanliness. Though his superiors knew about the blades and hoped it would provide more money once he finished, they did not know who inspired them, only Tobi did and he had died when Sven turned 15.

Upon arriving at the factory in his military uniform which would allow him to just go straight to the graduation after work, he immediately sets to work on his special blades, having showed up early for that purpose. He is determined to finish them _today_. He starts on them, getting lost in the process as he applies the final touches to their production. When he finishes he begins to test them, first by applying paint to the bottom piece that snaps into place within the blade handles of the 3DMG. As he waits for it to dry he thinks about his choice to chose the Military Police tonight. Everything that had happened since 845 pushed him closer to enlisting until he finally did in 849. However, it was the appearance of the titan shifters that caused him to choose Military Police. He did not want to end up like his brother, nor work alongside the shifters; he just wants to be safe. But would he still be safe even with them? **Of course not! **The voice suddenly hisses to him in quiet indignation. Though he knows that it is from his memory, brought up by his sub consciousness, he decides to entertain himself while the paint dries. He argues with himself, not the voice, while he contemplates and questions his choice. In the end he chooses to go with his first choice, the choice he had chosen by gut instinct when he had first joined, not the Military Police. The tests start on all eight of the blades and prove to surprise Sven. He out did even his own expectations, it amazes him as he goes about the tests, getting excited by his success. The rest of the day proves to be fairly exciting and full of hope for Sven, he hasn't felt so happy for over 18 years now.

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Sven's day brightens from its gloom as he receives his new uniform; the green cloak with the Wings of Freedom on the back and the Wings of Freedom patch to replace the two crossed swords of the training squad. Sven puts the cloak back on, feeling as excited as a little kid as he dons the uniform of his new regiment, the Scout Regiment. Though many factors had drawn Sven to this moment, he had always wanted to join them since he was little and his brother first joined. He had seen his brother once before he died, but that had never hindered Sven's desire, only his resolve.

The excited buzz of his comrades changes to puzzlement then to surprise and suspicion. He looks at his campaigns around him before turning completely around to see what it is they are staring at. A male of average build and height, tan complexion, teal-green eyes, and dark brown hair is standing next to a shorter male that seems very faintly familiar to Sven, like someone he had known either long ago or only saw once in a brief glance. He looks really intimidating to Sven and he briefly imagines someone in the shadows, their face obscured, but really familiar. He knew it was a memory, this male in his mind that wears black, knee-high boots, black pants, and a white, long sleeved, button up, collared shirt. Sven shrugs off the image as unimportant as his new squad leader begins to introduce the 105th Trainee's Squad to the two people. The taller one he introduces as Eren Yeager, the titan shifter, member of the Special Operations Squad, and former member of the 104th Trainee's Squad. Sven realizes that Eren being a titan shifter is what had put people on edge. Sven had never kept up with politics so he had never known what Eren looked like, only that he existed. Sven had barely even known what his name was until this moment. He studies him intensely as he is introduced as Humanity's Hope. The shorter one is introduced as Captain Something Ackerman; Sven didn't catch his first name. He just caught that he is the squad leader of the Special Operations Squad and in charge of Eren. A recruit up ahead darkly mutters something about Eren under his breath that is caught by the Captain. Sven can't hear him and doesn't care; he's too busy studying the two and their close proximity to each other. If Sven didn't know better he might think that they were together.

"James Hightower," the recruit says with a salute. Sven hated Hightower; he is too arrogant in Sven's opinion. The Captain says something that seems to shock Hightower, much to Sven's happiness, and Sven decides that he is alright. Their squad leader goes to talk to the two as the recruits wait for orders, feeling uncomfortable about Eren's presence. He calls the recruits attention and they fall in line. He follows Eren and the Captain, who is leading a horse, as they head towards the stables.

When they get to the stables the group separates from Eren and the Captain. Excitement courses through Sven. A few years back he had found two escaped Survey Corps horses, as mother and her colt. He named the colt Gyro and raised it, teaching it all sorts of cool moves and tricks. When he found a Survey Corps member he returned the two horses. The member, Sven thinks he remembers their name to be Petra, had been impressed with what he had taught Gyro and promised to take care of him, even going so far as to promise the horse would be his if he joined the Scout Regiment.

She obviously kept her promise because he looks well groomed and is appointed to Sven. He feels playful and mischievous when they start to practice horseback riding, something a good portion of them had never done, and so he proceeds to show off with Gyro. He is so busy showing off and remembering all the tricks he taught Gyro that he never notices when Eren and Levi show up to watch them sometime later. Levi had his horse now, as he had been leading Eren's earlier, something Sven didn't know, just as he didn't know that it is Levi, _the_ Levi. Levi hasn't recognized him yet, but is impressed by the youngster's ability and ease with his horse. When Sven gets bored, Levi tries to keep him showing off his skills by calling out pointers to him. Sven is surprised to see the Captain and feels like he's heard his voice before. He shrugs it off quickly, however, and proceeds to obey, executing the new maneuvers with ease. Levi begins to train him in special maneuvers in hopes of seeing how well the recruit does. Sven eventually spots how his friends are floundering with the basics and goes over to help them, leaving Levi behind. As soon as they master the basics, they no longer need his help, so Levi tries to take advantage of the opportunity. Sven hears the hoof steps of their approach and feels devious. He decides to race them so he whispers his secret word to Gyro, the one that tells him to stay ahead of their pursuers, not racing, just keeping out of reach. The horse looks back to see who they are running for and spies Levi heading towards them. Gyro dashes forward and away, matching their pace so that they are neither gaining nor losing distance.

Levi tries to tell Sven to stop but he is too far away. Sven directs Gyro to a densely packed portion of the forest that surrounds the castle, hoping to lose Levi in there. As they bound over undergrowth and through trees as though they spent their whole life there, Sven manages to lose Levi. He quickly uses his 3DMG to escape into the trees. He hears the sound of another 3DMG behind him and realizes what's going on. As he races away through the trees, Levi begins to rapidly catch up. He tries everything to lose him but does not manage it until he sneaks into a hollow within a nearby tree, hiding there. Along the way he had spied how mad Levi is about the little prank and it had scared Sven badly. He covers himself up with his cloak and hides in the shadows of the tree, hoping he isn't found. Through a small slit in the cloak he sees Levi heading away from him and feels lightly relieved. He gives it a full hour before he goes down to Gyro who had found him five minutes prior, just as he was trained to do. Sven returns to castle grounds slowly and sneaks his way back to his quarters, hoping he isn't noticed by anyone, _especially_ Levi. He safely makes his way back to his quarters and settles down, passing out quickly.

A hand clamps down on Sven's mouth and nose, suffocating him and waking him up at the same time, his eyes flying open. _Shit! The Captain!_

"You little shit," he hisses at Sven, "just who do you think you are, anyways?" He is very obviously furious with Sven so he complies by staying silent. "Why did you run away from me?"

Spots flick across Sven's vision and he gasps for breath when Levi lets go, coughing to regain his breath. When he does he squeaks out an answer, glad he has his own room inside the castle for what is not the first time. "I thought it would be fun to have a little race." He whimpers to the irate captain, "when I saw how angry you were I kept running because I was too afraid to approach you."

Surprise briefly flicks in the Captain's eyes before he bluntly asks, "what is your name?"

Feeling confused he replies, "Sven Kar'Dargo."

Shock fills Levi's face openly, "Sven?" He whispers like he's lost in a distant memory. Concern fills his face a few seconds later as he realizes what has happened. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Sven just stared at him, he chokes him then he gets worried? Sven shakes his head; he doesn't understand this strange man. Levi takes his head shake to mean that he is okay and resumes his normal, unflappable composure. "Good, I would hate to hurt an old friend of mine."

Sven stares in confusion, old friend? Levi looks at him, furrowing his brow further, "you do remember me, don't you Sven? It's me, Levi, remember?"

Memories flood into Sven's mind as his eyes fly open in shock and his mouth drops open. He suddenly remembers everything that had happened, including how the voice that argued with him was Levi's, how the memory of his cold grey eyes inspired good days for Sven, and how the blades were meant for him. _The blades!_ Sven jumps out of bed, pushing past Levi and rushes to his closet, tearing it open in search of his blades. Levi comes up behind him and watches, waiting. Sven pulls out the pack of blades and presents them to Levi. "I made these for you, Levi, I didn't think you would join the military, but figured you would enjoy them anyways.

Levi takes them with caution and looks them over. "Their different," he deadpans, stating the obvious.

"I spent the last 18 years designing them specifically for you. I knew you were fast and strong so I made them tougher and lighter. They are easier to clean then normal blades and are very easy to sharp. It's harder to dull these then it is normal blades and they are slightly more flexible. They are also easier to fix. They break evenly into the separate sections so that you don't have to worry about searching for a million little pieces. I didn't finish them until the very day of the Choosing Ceremony. I got special permission to go home since the graduation ceremonies were delayed. I went back and finished them. I finished them for you, Levi." Concern suddenly fills Sven as questions arise in his mind, blazing a scar of confusion deeply within his mind. Levi inspects the blades before wrapping them back up carefully. He looks Sven in the eyes before motioning for Sven to take a seat.

Sven sits down on his bed, leaning his back against the wall and Levi sits down next to him, with some distance between the two. Sven asks his first question, "are you and Eren close?" He suddenly wished Levi would say no, he didn't understand why but he felt something within him beg to hear they were just friends, to hear that Levi wanted to more than just friends with Sven. He immediately pushed that away, _no, I do not love Levi that way._ He scolds himself as Levi sighs quietly.

"Yes, we are," he murmurs quietly, "over the past year Eren and I have gotten along well and even moved closer to each other." He looks Sven in the eyes, "you are my greatest friend, Sven, and you deserve to know everything." He crosses his arms over his chest then his legs at the ankles and stares at his shoes, "I feel myself being drawn to Eren," he says, hushed, as if he's afraid of his feelings. "I think I'm falling in love with him, but I can't risk that." Pain enters his voice as he continues, he's a titan, and so young, but yet . . ." he lets out a soft sigh before looking up at Sven, who had managed to keep a calm, unrevealing expression through the whole thing. "I use to be in love with you, Sven," the younger one's eyes fly open and snap to stare at the older one with sharp, glinting eyes, "I think it is part of the reason why I hate myself for loving Eren."

Sven studies Levi harshly, considering him with dark eyes that hide all emotion. _If Levi had loved me, why had he kept it a secret?_ Sven felt jealousy and anger flare within him as he realizes how much he loves Levi, and that no matter how much he fought it, it is there and always has been. He forgot about Levi because his love for the older man had threatened to rip him apart and so finding out that he returned that love so long ago pissed Sven off something horrible. He wants to punch someone, preferably Eren or Levi, but he doesn't dare. "Is he the reason you joined?" Sven dares to ask instead, letting his anger show only in the way that his eyes darken into a glare. He refused to let Levi have the satisfaction of finding out that Sven likes him back. His face remains calm and open while his voice is calm too, betraying nothing. Levi will see that he is hiding something, Sven realizes correctly, but he will not know what so long as Sven can manage to keep his swirling emotions hidden.

Levi shakes his head no. "Seven years ago, Farlan, Isabel and I were caught using 3DMG's we had . . . found. The Scout Regiment was the ones who found us. At the time, Keith Shadis was commander and Erwin Smith was just another member. They managed to capture us and Erwin blackmailed me into joining." He turns away from Sven, "I got Farlan and Isabel killed when I abandoned them to go and try to kill Erwin Smith. I got my last squad killed when I left them on their own as well." The last part was whispered so softly Sven began to wonder if he had even heard right. Part of him wants to give Levi a hug and tell him it is okay while another part of him despises him too much to care to pity him. Sven hates the divide within his heart that Levi has caused but he can't do anything about it. He's the one who asked the question after all. Levi looks up at Sven, "please don't hate me," he pleads softly, "you have the right too, it took me up until last year to realize that you loved me," Sven looks away, feeling weary and irritated, but calming down at the same time, "don't be mad at me about Eren, please, be upset with me, you have that right, but not mad, please. I was mad at Erwin and got my two, at the time, greatest friends killed. I didn't even realize how much they meant to me until they died. Please don't get mad at me and make my same mistake." His wounded voice broke through to Sven's forgiving side.

He sighs heavily before fixing Levi with depressed eyes, "I won't be mad at you, and I won't react as such, but I'm not talking to you," Levi tried to protest but Sven cut him off, "please, Levi just give me some time and space. I need some time to myself to gather my thoughts and feelings on these turn of events, it's a lot to take in." He smiles a true smile, a small one, but a true one, "I'm happy to see you again and I'm excited that we get to see each other again, I just need to adjust to realization of what this means."

Levi nods curtly in understanding, calming down to his normal, composed self, "I can do that," he says, "but I just need one thing from you, I need to know if friendship is possible between the two of us if I got together with Eren. He probably doesn't even like me back, but I need to know your feelings on the situation,"

Sven heaves a long sigh and looks away from Levi, standing up, "do whatever you want, Levi, as long as you're happy, I'm happy. It will hurt to see you with Eren, but it would be even worse to see you miserable without him. Do not let me influence your decision on love," his words flowed from memory now, he had told these same words to another girl he fell in love with at the factory, he didn't love her as much as he had loved Levi, but it was still enough to have made it painful, "just follow your heart to whomever it may lead, who knows, you might end up with someone completely different, same for me." He knew that the last part would only come true if he settled for someone as a consolation for losing Levi. Experience taught him that Levi is the only one for him. He had loved many people, but none of them had he loved more than Levi. Levi nods his head and gives Sven a brief smile, something that Sven had never seen before, which shocked him, before getting up and leaving the room. Sven stared after him, stunned, before curling upon his bed, his mind buzzing. This day had been good up until Levi showed up. He groaned, burring his face in his knees, silently begging the next day to not be any worse.


	3. Old Scars

**S. Rune, you are amazing. Thank you for your reviews! I hope this chapter answers your questions! :)**

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Because their place within the castle had run out of space, Sven had been allowed a room away from all the others. It was even in a different wing, which is lucky for Sven, he supposes. He looks at the full moon, high up in the sky, as he sits at his desk in front of his window. Though exhaustion pulls at Sven's eyelids and makes them heavy, he refuses and even fights to stay awake. For the fifth night in a row since his and Levi's reunion, Sven had not gotten any sleep, no matter how hard he tried.

He sighs quietly and looks down at the closed book in front of him. He had lied to Levi, blaming his need for space away from Levi on pure jealousy, knowing full well that Levi had never fully grasped an understanding of what made Sven, Sven. If he had, Levi would have known that Sven is happy and pleased to see Levi moving on. He would have known that Sven would normally have been supportive, helpful even, and would have gone out of his way to help Levi get together with Eren. Levi would have known that Sven's rage wasn't real, that it was all a front. Levi should have Sven straight through Sven's lie, but he didn't and Sven's too exhausted to care.

He looks back at the moon, once more wishing that Levi keeps his promise to stay away from Sven, he needs to forget Levi, and he needs to do it _fast_. _Which isn't going to happen anytime soon_, Sven thinks with remorse. The night terrors had been getting worse since they first had started again five days ago, indicating to Sven that he wouldn't be forgetting Levi anytime soon. They kept him awake at night and made him more exhausted then he had been when he tried to sleep. They had nearly killed him once, a long time ago, when Sven first arrived to the factory, and he knows that they will not only succeed this time, but take someone else with him when they do.

He thinks about the first one he had ever had. It was his first night away from home and he was 12 years old at the time. In it he had dreamt that Levi was being tortured and Sven was unable to save him no matter how much Levi pleaded with him to. Sven's heart broke as he thrashed around in his sleep, waking himself up within a few moments. They had only gotten worse from there.

The terrors had kept Sven up and made him more exhausted than he was during the day, slowly killing him as time dragged on. After five months, Sven broke and was committed to a mental hospital. He had lost it so completely that they had to keep him restrained. A week later Tobi's death reached Sven and his mind healed enough to allow him to be freed and return to his apprenticeship. It wasn't enough, however, to stop the terrors, and after six months of living away from home, Sven almost died.

He was in the middle of work when he passed out from exhaustion and almost fell into the blast furnace he was working next to. His teacher, Alex Schmitt, had caught Sven in time to save him, but not enough to keep him from being scorched by the heat and flames. Sven's entire chest had been scarred by the fire.

When Sven came to after the burning sensation by the burns was gone, he was so tired that he had contracted amnesia and couldn't even remember his own name. It was the first time he forgot Levi. It was the first time Sven got sweet, peaceful, uninterrupted sleep. He stayed asleep for a whole week, slowly regaining his memory through dreams and flashes of images within his mind. But he never remembered Levi or why Tobi joined the Survey Corps. He never remembered what the terrors had been about. His mind elected to ignore that which had broken Sven; Tobi's reason for joining the military and the love of Sven's life, Levi.

He gently touches his chest through his shirt, chills running softly down his spine, as he remembers how much it had first burned. With a painful and violent shudder that contorts his whole body completely, he remembers his first night terror. He still can't remember what Tobi has to do with it. _It doesn't matter,_ he growls softly at himself, hating himself for lying to Levi and for joining the Survey Corps; _it was just a stupid decision_. But why did he ever make it? Why did he feel like Tobi has something to do with it?

He shakes his head, _all I need to do is forget Levi and then I can be free again. No one will die because of me if I can just forget all about him._ He scolds himself gently as he gets up and goes to lie down on his bed, once more trying to sleep. _Levi has Eren, if they get together then Levi will too busy with him to try and interact with me, then I can forget him once more._ He knows that he still won't ever forget him, no matter what he tells himself, he cares too much to let Levi go so easily. He sighs softly and closes his eyes, all the while wishing, with futile hope, for his night terror to stay away.

He screams and thrashes before waking up with a sob. His night terrors always consist of someone, mostly Levi and Sven's mother, that Sven loves dearly being tortured by some unknown stranger. Sven is always powerless to stop them, forced instead to watch as they are broken and begin to plead for Sven to kill them. The strange always tells Sven, in a wicked voice, that the only way to end their suffering is to kill them his self.

A flash of a memory passes through Sven as he sits up quickly, panting and covered in sweat. In his mind, Sven sees a sadistic gleam in Tobi's eyes as he whispers something to him. Tobi _defiantly_ has something to do with it; Sven just wishes he could remember what it was exactly. Maybe it was because of some fear Levi accidently put it into Sven? It certainly couldn't be because of that one time, could it?

He frowns as he remembers the night. It had been the last time Levi walked home with Sven, the first time Sven had realized that Tobi was sadistic, and the first time Sven had realized that he loves Levi as more than just a friend. Sadness wells up inside him as he remembers how badly Tobi had beaten up the starved underground kid Sven had befriended. At the time of the incident, Sven was 8, Levi 14, while Tobi had been 16 and full of contempt for the two young kids. Levi had stepped in front of Sven, shielding him from Tobi's sadistic nature, and taken the blows originally meant for Sven. It wasn't until Sven had seen the look in Levi's eyes that he realized Levi wasn't too weak to fight back; he had chosen not to fight back in hopes of Tobi leaving Sven alone. Levi had realized something Sven hadn't at first; fighting back would make it worse for both of them. Levi had protected Sven, someone he barely knew, and in that moment Sven's heart broke for Levi and swelled with love and admiration for the older kid at the same time. Sven nursed Levi back to health and fell deeper in love with him in the following days after the incident.

He thinks that maybe that day had made Sven irrationally afraid of Tobi. He looks over at his desk as he considers the idea. It doesn't seem right considering the fact that Sven's terrors never solely stayed focused on Levi. He sometimes dreamed about his mother and even occasionally Tara, the sweat natured girl he had befriended after his first shitty year in the factory. She had brightened his days and made his time there happy and pleasant. She even followed him into the Survey Corps.

He lets out a soft sigh and grabs an extra shirt from his closet, using it to wipe off the sweat before discarding it into the pile of other dirty clothes. he starts to walk past the door when he hears a soft knock. He looks at the door in surprise for a moment before walking over and opening it up. Tara gives him a shy look, her blond bangs shadowing her face as she stares up at him through her eyelashes.

"Sorry," she whispers sheepishly, "I can't sleep."

Sven gives her a soft smile and opens the door wider to let her in, "neither can I."

She sits down at his desk and watches him as he shuts his door gently and walks over to his bed. He remakes the sheets as she silently watches him, and he enjoys the distraction her presence provides him. He gingerly sits down on his bed when he is finished and looks up at her.

"What's wrong?" She inquires softly, concern etching onto her face, "you've looked exhausted for the past five days and no one can seem to figure out why."

He gives her a noncommittal shrug, "I just can't sleep; that's it, really." He hates lying to her but he's not about to tell her the truth; that he sees her, his mom, and his love, Levi, being tortured in his sleep. That will surely get him kicked out of the Scout Regiment and he can't have that happen. He has to stay in, though he can't say why.

She frowns at him, always having known him right off the bat without knowing anything of his background. "why won't you tell me the truth?"

He looks at her with sad eyes, _just because you love me and just because we get along really well doesn't mean you are going to find out about my past_, "because all you need to know is that I can't sleep."

She huffs out an irritated sigh and his eyes soften, _she really cares about me._ "I just wish you would talk to me more," she huffs out.

He gives her a small, amused smile, and a shake of his head, "then why don't we talk about how much you love me," he teases her lightly.

She blushes, burning bright red, and looks away from him, her clear blue eyes filling with embarrassment, "what makes you think I'm in love with you?"

Her squeaky voice makes him chuckle lightly, putting him in a good mood despite his fatigue, "why would _anyone_ visit _me_ at this time of night?" He says, pretending to be appalled and baffled, laying the tease on thick.

She smiles and looks at him, "yeah," she plays along, "why visit _you_ at anytime anyways? You're always such a downer, too serious for my taste," she screws up her face with mock disgust and he laughs out loud at that.

"Yeah, right, I can never seem to get my head out of my work." He laughs along with her as they enjoy their little inside joke; James had said Sven was too serious once when he had made a sarcastic comment that went right over his head. Tara and Sven laughed about it often, usually in front of James for added humor. He calms down and looks at her with a bright smile, "but seriously though," he says, making her still out of fear, "James is an idiot."

She rolls her eyes, hating the fact that Sven knew her well enough to know that she is in love with him and is playful enough to tease her about it constantly. She especially hated that Sven knew this and never made any advances towards her; why didn't he like her back the way that she likes him? She couldn't figure it out.

Sven takes her hand in his, sympathy shinning in his eyes as he looks into hers, "I know your frustrated, Tara, but I will probably only ever see you as a friend. It sucks, I know that it does because I have been through it before," he thinks of the day that he realized Levi probably would never see him as anything more than a friend, "but one day you will find the one that is right for you."

She snorts, "you're the only one for me, Sven. Besides, I'm in the Survey Corps now; it's too late for me to find anyone new."

He shakes his head, "you don't know everyone here," he argues softly.

She glares at him, snatching her hand away, "I don't need to," she snaps, "I only want to know you, Sven." Her whole demeanor shifts from irritated to pleading as she continues on, "why can't you just take a chance on me? We may never find," she pauses as realization dawns on her, "who?" She whispers quietly, "who is the one you have found?"

He gives her a sad smile and shakes his head, "I have loved and been loved by many over the course of my lifetime and each time I have become more and more sure of my love for one in particular. I know what true love feels like only because I have gone through other loves many times before. I once thought I loved Vivian," he looks her in the eyes as he speaks of his ex, "but then I realized that I loved another more and so I dumped her. That has how all my relationships have been. I just got lucky enough to realize that I love them more than you before I strayed into a relationship with you." She looks hurt as she lowers her gaze to his hand, "hey," he says softly, tugging her hand to encourage her to look him in the eyes, "think about it, Tara," she looks at him, making eye contact, "would you rather we broke up a long time ago and are now no longer friends?" She shakes her head, "then be happy with just our friendship and learn to love another."

She lets out a soft sigh and stands up, her hand falling out of his. "Okay," she whispers quietly, moving to sit beside him, "I guess you're right." She leans against him, "I just really wish you could have been the one," he looks down at her with sad eyes, "it would have made life easier."

He chuckles sadly, "life is never easy, Tara."

"I know," she mutters tiredly, looking straight ahead now.

He wraps his arms around her, pulling her into a soft embrace. They lay back on his bed and she falls asleep in his arms a few moments later, leaving him to stay awake on his own. He doesn't mind, her presence alone is enough to distract him. She reminds him of happy days at the factory which he thinks of now, reminiscing to pass the time away.

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**:( Poor Sven.**


	4. Levi

**:P I need to start editing these before posting them.**

**P.S.: Sven just was remembering that moment in his haste to try and figure out what Tobi has to do with his night terrors, that's all.**

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**Chapter 4: Levi**

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_As Sven climbs out of the sewage tunnel closest to his home, Levi looks up at the full moon high above them."I've never noticed before that the moon changes."_

"_Yeah, it'll go completely black in a few weeks." Sven walks over and stands next to Levi, looking up at the moon with him. Levi watches the kid, who is six years his junior and only a foot shorter than him, out of the corner of his eye. "It'll be a bit harder for me to walk through these alleyways when it does."_

_Levi looks around, scanning the area, before Sven takes the lead. They walk through the maze for only a few minutes, talking occasionally, with Levi feeling completely exposed under the open sky. "Isabel would love to be up here, traveling with you," he mutters quietly, not even realizing that Sven had heard until he speaks up._

"_Will I ever get to meet them?" He inquires softly as he falls into step with Levi, walking beside the older boy._

_Levi looks down at him, startled, "huh?"_

"_Your friends," Sven says, suddenly shy and quiet, looking down at the ground, "will I ever get to meet Isabel and Farlan?" He sounds like he is afraid to ask the question, like he is afraid of Levi._

_Levi looks ahead of them, considering the question as they walk in the shadows. _It would probably be a very bad idea to let this eight year old brat meet them. _He thinks to himself quietly, "probably not," he says._

_Sven lets out a soft sigh of resignation as they round the final corner, putting his house into view in the near distance. "Thanks for walking me home again, Levi," Sven lets out softly as he notices his home up ahead._

_Levi grabs Sven's arm, making him stop, when he sees someone move out of the shadows out of the corner of his eye. The pair turns to look as Tobi, Sven's older brother by eight years, steps out of the shadows, his face darkening with anger. The trio freezes, Levi's hand still tightly gripping Sven's upper arm as he regards the taller boy with cold calculating eyes._

_His grey gaze analyzes Tobi's tousled blond hair, piercing, ice blue eyes, medium frame, and hard features with calmness. Tobi takes a few steps towards them, causing Sven to back up into Levi in his escape to get away from his older brother._

"_I thought you promised me that you wouldn't visit _him_ anymore, you little shit." Tobi growls at his younger brother with menace._

_The brave little Sven, trembling against Levi, looks up at Tobi in defiance, "I never made such a promise!" He declares without a hint of fear in his voice. Levi feels admiration towards the younger boy's bravery for he can tell that he is scared senseless._

_Tobi lets out a snarl as he raises his fist to hit him. Levi quickly wraps his arms around Sven and spins them around so that Tobi's fist lands heavily on his back. He pushes Sven out in front of him, away from Tobi, as the older boy lets out a growl, "you little _rat_," he snarls, spitting the last word, as he lunges at Levi from behind, pinning him down on his stomach. "You think you own the world, don't you?" He hisses at the silent boy as he slams his elbow down into Levi's head. He doesn't even flinch as Tobi keeps hitting him, raining blows all over his body._

_He looks up at Sven, who stares in horror, willing him to not try and save him. Levi could see something that Sven could not; Tobi is afraid for Sven, afraid for his little brother, and it both scares and infuriates him. Levi recognized almost instantly that Tobi never intended to hit Sven in the first place, he just wanted him out of the way._

"_Imma teach you a lesson you aren't gona forget soon, sewer boy," Tobi snarls defiantly as he hits Levi in the head again. Levi knew it was Tobi's way of trying to protect Sven, he is afraid for his younger brother. _Tobi is right to be afraid of me;_ Levi thinks to himself,_ I'm not the greatest person that Sven could have ever stumbled across. His reaction is a healthy one. _Levi knows that he posses, in Tobi's mind, a threat to Sven, so he does not fight back. He will let Tobi have this victory so that he could understand that Levi will _never_ hurt Sven; he cares too much for the little brat._

_Sven meets Levi gaze with horrified eyes as he watches Levi lay there. He must have seen something in Levi's eyes because his soften with remorse as he just watches. Levi keeps his gaze, drawing strength from those warm, chocolate brown eyes, so full of kindness and remorse._

_Tobi stops and presses Levi's face into the stone ground, lowering his head to hiss into Levi's ear, "I better not see you ever again, you little rat. Don't go near my brother ever again, you hear me?"_

_Levi whispers quietly, so that only Tobi can hear, "I would never hurt Sven," he says, voicing Tobi's fear, "I care for the little runt too much to ever let him befall harm."_

_Tobi looks at Levi in shock before shaking it off and standing up. He gives Levi one last kick in the side for good measure. "Shitty rat," he mutters crossly before looking over at Sven, "let's go." He barks at the startled boy._

"_Can't we move him somewhere safer?" He pleads with Tobi, staying rooted to the spot._

_Levi groans softly as he turns over onto his back and looks to see Tobi glare at him, obviously hating him for the way that Sven cares for him. "No," he says, his tone sounding that his statement is final._

"_Then can I at least say good bye to him?" Sven asks with growing desperation._

_Ice blue eyes narrow as they drill into cold, grim, grey ones. "Make it quick," he snaps before turning towards the house and walking off._

_Sven rushes over to Levi as the older boy struggles to prop himself up, his back aching with pain. "I'm so sorry, Levi," he whispers with concern as he helps Levi sit up better, "I should have known better. I'm so sorry."_

_Levi looks into his warm brown eyes, "don't worry, Sven," he says softly, "Tobi won't hurt you, you are safe from him."_

_Doubtful eyes question Levi. "Thank you," he says before hesitating._

_Levi lets a small smile quirk his lips up slyly, "he cares for you, you know that, right?"_

_The younger boy shakes his head with measured sadness, "I wish that were true, Levi, I do, I really do," he whispers with remorse._

_Levi wants to give the small boy a hug but he knows better to do that. He holds up a fist that Sven taps with a fist of his own, "it'll get better one day, I promise." He takes his chin gently and tilts his head so that Sven's eyes meet his, "don't worry too much about me, Sven, I will be alright."_

_Sven gives him a small, sad smile, "I know you will, Levi." He stands up, "can we meet again, soon?"_

_Levi frowns and they hear Tobi call out in the distance, "oi! Brat! Hurry it up already!"_

"_I think you better just stay away for right now. In a few weeks, go to the stairs that lead to the underground tunnels, you can find me waiting there. Come at midnight, I'll find you," he promises the small, worried looking boy._

_Sven nods, still looking worried, "okay," he whispers quietly before running off to catch up with Tobi, watching his friend from over his shoulder._

_Levi keeps Sven's gaze the whole way and continues to watch as Sven enters his house, followed by Tobi who gives Levi one last glare before shutting the door behind him. He lets out a soft sigh as he stands up with a wince. Damn he hurt all over his back, fucking Tobi. A huff escapes him as he slowly makes his way back to the tunnels that he currently calls home. A soft voice in the distance tugs at Levi as it calls out his name, pulling him out of his memories._

He slowly opens his eyes up to wearily look Hange in the eyes. He straightens up and stretches a little, his back stiff from leaning against the tree he had fallen asleep against. She moves out of his way as he stands up and looks at the sunrise in the distance. "Have you woken up Eren?" He asks, jumping straight to the point.

She shakes her head, "I was on my way back from following Sven around in the forest when I found you fast asleep out here."

He feels surprise flash across his mind as he looks away at the castle, "why were you following Sven?"

He hears her shrug, "I couldn't sleep so I wanted to find out who it is that keeps sharpening the blades left around in that extra meeting room with the table. I saw him finish a blade then get up to leave. Out of curiosity I decided to follow him around."

He hides his feelings and thoughts as he looks at her with calm eyes, "what did you find out?"

She gives him a smile, "that he likes to take long walks through the forest at night rather than sleep. He walked the whole night away." She turns thoughtful as she considers Sven lightly, "I don't think he sleeps at all, no matter how tired he gets."

Levi frowns at this, why isn't his friend sleeping? Why does he stay up so late? He shrugs away the question; it's not his business to know or ask. Besides, he promised Sven that he would give him space and so he will.

Levi begins to walk towards the castle, "go wake up Eren so that we can begin your latest experiments already," he mutters absentmindedly, remembering his dream.

"Yes, Captain Levi," she says cheerfully as she disappears off.

He barely even registers her departure as he considers his dream. It had been in that moment, on that day, that Levi had begun to fall in love with Sven. He doesn't understand why it all is suddenly coming back to him now, all his feelings, when he had managed to keep them at bay after Sven moved away. He scolds himself for letting his feelings get out of hand; Sven is a friend and, not only that, but he is a friend that doesn't need him anymore.

Hange and Eren meet Levi outside the portion of ground that is sectioned off for Hange's experiments and begin to discuss the details. Levi listens with half an ear as his thoughts are consumed with Sven and his feelings towards him. His stomach does a little flip and his heart skips when he looks up and spots Sven walking towards them, looking down at the ground in front of him. He inwardly berates himself for his reaction as he turns his back on Sven, facing the others.

He listens to the conversation intently for a few moments before he is distracted by the sound of Sven walking up behind him. His heart begins to beat a little faster as hope faintly flourishes that Sven will talk to him. Disappointment fills him as he hears Sven turn and take the stairs into the castle, ignoring all of them completely. He looks at Eren and begins to feel torn between to two men; before Sven had appeared, Levi had begun to fall in love with the titan shifter, something he had at first resented. He suppresses a soft sigh as he zones back into their conversation.

* * *

"_Stay safe and unharmed, Levi, I don't want to find out that you died in these tunnels." _Sven's words echo in Levi's mind as he unties his cravat carefully. _Sven reaches into his bag and hands Levi a small parcel. He gives him a curt nod then walks up the stairs. Levi watches him go for a few moments before loosening the ties around the parcel carefully. He turns back to the tunnel and walks in the direction opposite their ledge. He moves the crisp paper away to reveal a clean, crisp, white cravat neatly folded in the paper. He frowns at it, wondering why Sven would give him something so pointless. He wraps it back up neatly and ties it closed once more. He stuffs it into a pocket on the inside of his jacket, deciding to keep it, even if it is a stupid scrap of fabric._

Levi runs his thumb over his cravat, feeling the soft fabric between his fingers, fondly remembering when Sven had given it to him. At first Levi hadn't even realized what it was. When had first joined the Scout Regiment was when he first found out what it was even called. Not long after that he found out what exactly it was and how it was worn. He has worn it every day ever since, out of found memory of his friend. He lets out a small sigh as he folds it up gently and puts it away. He takes off his jacket and lies back on his bed, listening to the sound of the rain patter against his window. He wonders briefly about how Sven's day went before pushing it out of his mind. Considering those type of things only made him want to talk to Sven all the more and he isn't about to let himself do that; Sven had asked for space and so he will get his fucking space.

Levi hates Sven's distant and cold attitude towards him but he doesn't betray his friend. He closes his eyes as he remembers the better days, the days when Sven would tell him stories and laugh about jokes that Levi had barely even paid attention to. He remembers the days when Sven had been his friend. Now he feels like an enemy and it weighs heavily on Levi, making him feel wearier then he already is.

"_Levi, are you going to kill me?"_

Sven's softly asked question rings through Levi's memory as he thinks back on when they first met.

"_Probably not," Levi had answered wearily._

He opens his eyes and looks at the ceiling in wonder.

"_Did he tell you to kill me?"_

The question had caught Levi off guard all those years ago. That stupid, inquisitive, six year old brat had managed to make Levi feel guilty about even considering such a thing. He had hated that feeling.

"_Of course he did."_

Levi's hissed reply had made Sven jump in fear, something that now makes Levi flinch as he remembers it. He struggles to fall asleep as flashes of him chasing after Sven flit though his mind. Levi hadn't found the little brat until a few days later, when Sven and a friend went exploring in the tunnels once more. Levi had been surprised to see that Sven had returned, and had instantly become curious about the kid. He slowly drifts off to sleep as he remembers confronting Sven. They had quickly become friends after that encounter, with Sven returning to visit Levi almost every night for two years.

_Sven's last words once more echo in Levi's mind as he slips out of consciousness, "stay safe and unharmed, Levi, I don't want to find out that you died in these tunnels."_

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**Reviews? Reviews would be nice.**


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